I am now 25 weeks, and I am still feeling great. Physically, I feel really, really good *knock on wood*. I know with Chase I was super tired at this stage, and I was having really bad heart palpitations. Luckily, I really don't have any major issues right now, and I am very thankful. I know that can change in a heartbeat, so I am hoping to feel good for as long as possible. I try to go for walks around the loop in our neighborhood once or twice a week, which from my house is a total of about a mile and a half I think. Sometimes I just do smaller walks, but I know it is good for me to get out. So, physically I'm good... mentally, I am, well, hanging in there, lol. No, I really am doing good, its just those lovely hormones that are making me a little more emotional than normal. When I look at myself in the mirror, I don't see myself anymore. I look so tired (my one physical complaint, but I really don't think I am too much more tired than I would be if I wasn't pregnant). Circles under my eyes, crazy hair - I feel so....old!!!! I thought I was going to stay looking young forever!! :-) I feel like I have to try harder to look presentable than I did a few years back, and it is kind of frustrating, but I guess it happens to the best of us. :-) We are all getting older, and that just means we need to make the most out of today, because it will be gone tomorrow. The best part of being a mom is that even though I might not like the way I look all the time, my boys love me so much and just see their Mommy. They think I am beautiful, and that is all that really matters anyways. Pregnancy might age me and might make me more hormonal, but it makes me feel important, and gives life a little different meaning. Sure, my face might look tired, but my body and my belly are even more beautiful now with this little life inside. I am living not just for myself. I am literally keeping another human alive. Each breath I take is for him; my heart is beating for him; and my life is really for him right now.
He is getting big enough where he will poke his little knee or foot on the side of my belly and keep it there long enough for me to feel the tiny little lump, or swipe it across my belly. All three babies have been in the exact same position on my right side, head down, with feet up on the right. I don't think he kicks and moves as much as the other two, but it is hard to exactly remember. Wesley started feeling the baby kick about a month ago. He gets so excited and tells me, "When the baby kicks me, it must mean he loves me!!" Chase has started saying, "Baby!?" and points to my tummy. I still don't think he gets it, but he sure is sweet. I am not really too nervous about having three kids (yet anyways), but it is amazing to me that there will be another human in our home in just a few short months whom I will be completely responsible for. I don't know him. I don't know what he looks like, or what his personality is like. I don't know anything about him, and yet I am already starting to form a love for him. We normally wouldn't allow someone in our home with whom we have never met, and know nothing about. We probably wouldn't agree to dedicate our whole life to feed, cloth, and nurture a stranger, and yet, in a way, that is what parenting is. Selfless love given to another. We really dedicate our lives to our kids, and that is a great way to live. I am glad he is safe and sound inside me, and I hope it stays that way for 15 more weeks, but it is fun thinking about him and imagining what he will look like. :-)
1 comment:
You are extremely beautiful!! You are still so young and pretty....don't ever forget that!!
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